Thank you…for causing me stress!

The other day I was really caught up in a project that had gone south. I have the philosophy that it’s GREAT to fail because each failure either teaches us something or gets us one step closer to success. Somedays that is an easier philosophy than practice. This particular day, I had forgotten to celebrate the failures.

There was also another person with whom I was was engaging in “head-to-head” combat. He just did NOT deliver and was making it my fault that he did not meet the deadline. Some words were thrown my direction that made me feel FIRE! You know that feeling when heat just bursts up through your stomach, chest and into your face? You don’t have time to control it…it’s not bubbling up…its a FULL ON BURSTING! I knew I had to clamp my mouth shut or I was going to be apologizing for the next month, if not legally for longer than that.

And suddenly, I remembered learning about Sacred Contracts and Noble Friends. One of the sacred contracts we make is to learn about our shadow side. That is our underbelly. Our dark parts. The stuff we really don’t like to talk about. Yet, by following our purpose, and doing what we do, we unveil the shadow. Revealing our shadow is very much what our purpose is about. More on that later…

To say it simply, it’s how and why we come up against our…not so shiny and brilliant sides…when leading others in business.

In life, our “Noble Friends” appear as adversaries. These are the people who teach you to be strong, who give you opportunities for growth and empowerment, merely by they way they treat you. You have the choice to see them as the worst and most harmful thing that are on this planet, or you can see them as teachers that you had a contract with to act this way so that you can grow.

It can be hard to make that choice in the moment, especially if your adversary has hurt you or is in the midst of making you extremely vulnerable. But we do have the choice.

So, back to the moment a few days ago…the heat rose! the fire burned! And I remembered to think to myself “THANK YOU! It’s good to see you again. What was I supposed to learn from you?” The lesson is still not exactly clear, but it will be in time.

So for now, I can stop the pain of making others wrong. I can see the value in the co-worker who missed a deadline due to a miscommunication of information. I can say “Thank You” to a Noble Friend for causing me stress and showing me that I can still hold communication.


  1. Celebrate your failures! Celebrate that you tried! Then ask yourself, what did I learn? where can I improve?
  2. Turn Adversaries into Noble Friends
  3. Who do you have to THANK for allowing you to be stronger?

If you can hold on to these simple, but not easy, pieces you are a step closer to UNSTOPPABLE!

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